Elsewhere I’ve suggested that you stock your pantry, set your bills on autopay, and try to cross some things off your list so they aren’t hanging over you anymore.
But even more essential than that, I want for you to go into surgery with a light heart.
So I suggest that you briefly bring to mind any problematic relationships that you have. Maybe you have a difficult neighbor. Maybe with this surgery looming, things have gotten tense with your spouse. Maybe someone close to you has pulled away during this time of your great need. Just let your attention take inventory, don’t get caught up in the details.
Blanket forgiveness means not setting conditions for forgiving the other person. Not waiting for some kind of agreement about how the blame should be apportioned. We don’t know, really, what conditions the other person is functioning under, and we don’t need to. But we are living with the toxicity of anger and resentment (even if we consider it mild or even invigorating). It is a poison to ourselves that we only imagine is directed outward.
Forgiving someone is a manifestation of your desire to live in the present, and be dead later.
Those feelings are in the way of feeling fully alive, at least alive in an unconstricted way. As Paulo Coehlo says,
You drown not by falling into a river, but by staying submerged in it.
Here’s the practice: Begin touching the area of your body that is in pain or discomfort (or limitation) with the fingers of either hand and say, “Whatever this is related to, I forgive it completely and it doesn’t matter anymore.” Say this three times, and then breathe slowly and deeply for a full minute, with the emphasis on the exhale.
You may experience some instant relief of symptoms. If you feel drawn to do so, you may continue to repeat this statement for another minute, with the full focus of your attention. Use this anytime or as often as necessary to release any anger or resentment which has become associated with your area of pain or limitation.
Inspired by the Huna technique described in Urban Shaman, by Serge Kahili King.